Posted by admin | Posted in Dog Care Tips | Posted on 17-05-2010
Tags: ahes, cremation, memorials, personalized dog urns, statuary, urns
Its hard to say goodbye
I deliberated about writing this article I find it hard to talk or write about the loss of a pet in the past and I know how emotionally difficult it is for us to make the final call. Write my thoughts down on paper, however, help me clarify my feelings, because is something that has been fundamental in my mind in recent months. Let me explain.
Some two months ago my Jack Russell named Rex developed a stiff back which was off and on until it began to fall and struggled to climb the stairs. I realized that in its rigidity was not a lot of pain, but enough to justify a visit to the vet and some X-rays and pain killers. X-rays showed only worked painkillers and bounced him. Thinking it was over and I was mended shocked when one morning unable to rise. This time I was in terrible pain and after an emergency call I rushed to the vet with my 12 year old daughter in tow as moral support. I feared the worst and being a daughter Vets I knew in my heart that back problems were bad news and usually not correctable. Fear that the decision would have to do was imminent and I feared that perhaps terrible burden of having to end my life s dog. The vet could see my distress and then a few strong shots offered a ray of hope on the expertise of a veterinary orthopedic specialist in Belfast who asked that his final verdict. Telephone calls were made and emergency equipment of my daughter and I went to Belfast to see the vet was going to save the day. As I sat in the waiting room I started feeling as a 3 year old child who lost his toy. Rex had wrapped in a blanket on my knees and tears rolled down my cheeks. The three ladies in the waiting room all the assured me that this practice can work wonders and they would get it resolved. I was wondering about how stupid I looked trying to keep my lower lip under control and tears. In my mind he was already dead and buried and I began to reflect on the words of comfort to the three women offered me to try to lift my spirits. How is it that only dog lovers could understand my misery? It made me think about how we feel ashamed of our sorrow for our pet. The thing is, it is a shame for many people recognize and is just a pet and you can not get another. For many of us are our dogs as our children, that is how strong is our commitment and when we have to make the final decision we feel enormous quilt and wonder not leave too long or does not do too soon. Many describe ourselves as the murderers is the quilt that remains with us after they're gone. Remember also that it is not just for us who are affected. Each family member will react differently to our pets death on the basis of their age, how attached, as well as his personality. There is no right or wrong way of mourning, but essential to ensure that the pain is not denied.
When it comes to talking about euthanasia and all try to assess the quality of our pet's life but how can we judge this? We can look at their appetite, how active they are, they still interact and continue the rest of the family. What about the movement, you still get up and move freely. As I sat in the waiting room to discuss their quality of life that he knew one thing for sure this time if the time my dog was until I had to be there right at the end.
I made that fatal error with Mickey. He was 16 and had a tumor in the lungs. I could not face to what we had to do so I sent my poor husband to the final hour. It was the worst mistake I ever made and for weeks afterwards I felt totally ashamed that I could not be my dog died. Mickey had cremated and age until the day of her urn of ashes sit on my mother's house and I refuse to throw s! She keeps reminding me too!
While sitting and thinking about past pets I was shocked when the vet's Orthopaedics present me to his room. I held my breath while examining Rex and waited for the verdict .. The conclusion was to operate, 70% chance of recovery and the odds were in my favor. So there it was wiped out to the theater and took me home with hope. Rex stayed in the vets for a full week. He had two break records and became the boy wonder when he tried to get to the day after the operation .. He came home in pain with strict instructions to gradually increasing exercise and made a recovery amazing .. It is difficult now to see how weak he was and its very easy to get drawn to long walks, when he seems to have so much energy and go, but is a weak point and when there becomes a walk in a long time he is tired. Its hard to judge just how much is too much. I am very grateful for the fact that is running, full of life and happy, but I am aware of the fact that this back problem can erupt at any time and knock back ugly in me that sense of despair. I know that if it happens again our time have been exhausted. I just could not bear to see through the fight a second time. It is then I'll have to put aside my own needs. I will allow myself time to grieve and not feel shame and all I know I did everything possible to Rex.
About the Author
Kathy is a health studies lecturer in human and animal health. She also has an online business dedicated to cats and dogs.
http://www.yourcatmydog.com
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